Saturday night was crazy at Tongs. it had its own fair share of fun before all the puking begin. haha. no no, it wasnt me puking. we still have an unopened bottle of johnny walker plus half bottles of chivas and vodka. haha, HOW?
Sunday was awesome.. went for church service with JTL. yes, i drove this time because i really dont wanna walk down to suntec from raffles hotel. haha! sermon was awesome. pastor prince touched on a few different topics about spiritual food thru leviticus and of God's love. i especially like how he said that.. your opinion about me is nice but not neccessary. u know like how bein loved by Him is by itself the true spiritual food that we feed on and etc.
Daddy's birthday celebration at my aunts went by quite fine. we had tonnes to eat - chilli crabs, black pepper crabs, sambal stingrays, chicken, chicken wings, hokkien mee, glutinuous rice and etc etc. haha! i must say we really bring meaning to the phrase "better more than less" haha! (: BUT ANYHOO, HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY. You're the number one man in my life, always will be! *kisses*
The weekends have been enjoyable.
Until i found out that... even as everything seems peaceful and seems to be moving on quite fine. despite whatever fun and happiness ive been enjoying, something seems to be lacking. i experience mixed emotions when im being liked, i fear when im being loved. is this the first step towards being all cynical to this thing called love? or is it jus the hurt and pain finding its healing path? i dont know. all i know is that im not ready for anything. and if not being ready means that i have to hurt someone, im sorry. i dont believe in jus going in for it for that moment, not anymore. and no, i dont have a definite answer as to how long more i need to get ready. but not yet.. cause if i love, i can do better than this.
I still find myself being in love with you, yes love. i know it, your picture still hasnt left my wallet. i still see outlines of ur face. even without pictures of you, i still remember how you look, ur every angle. i still think about... how you've been? are you leading a life you wanted? is this how you envisioned it to be? does it make you happy? do you miss me around? did it work out to be the best solution? dont ask me why. i jus cant help it. but, i'd get out of it. it jus takes time (:
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